Today marks the end of a wonder journey of 4 yrs with my current organization.. I have no words to explain how I am feeling g right now.. 
As I travel to my office e today,  I cannot help but wonder how many days, How many memories are associated with my office here.. It is sad how you give so much to an organisation and you have to leave everything at the end to tale upon new challenges in your life..  Being my first job, I’ve had a lot of experiences and loads for challenges…
As I type this post, my eyes are welled up thinking about how I will not be coming to office tomorrow..  Same was the case when I was drafting the last working day mail.. That is one difficult job to.do I would say… I could not gather words to describe how I felt.. Couldn’t gather the courage to meet up all my friends in the office.. Who have been with me through thick and thin.. Have seen me grow on this organisation..  know what this place means to me.. Saying that I will not say that I am.not excited for the new opportunities…  Mind you I am.. Very excited..  But it is not at all easy to move on… Goodbyes are hard they say… I say they’re devastating… Knowing that you will not get to meet people you’ve been seeing for the last four years.. Settling into a new place.. Taking up new responsibilities is scary..  A lot!!!
I am.glad that I got to know so many people here..made so.many memories.. All I can say is I’m going to miss this all..

In another context,  it’s my mom’s birthday today.. May you have a very long life.. Be happy as always.. Love you aai..

That’s all for today I guess!!! 

Birthdays… 🎂

January brings in loads of birthdays for me… Being my birthday month, I enjoy January the most.. This year my birthday turned out to be the most exciting birthday ever… :):):):):)
We were on a holiday..  To goa.. Yes you heard it right folks!!!!  I was in goa for my birthday this year…  And It was very well planned by J…  Love you honey for this trip😘..  Thank you so much!! Twas a much needed break…  After all the tiring shifting and settling into the new place.. I really needed a vacation…
It was a crazy vacation of 4 days.. Travelling..  Chatting..  Eating..  Dancing..  Drinking and what not…  Extremely thrilled to see such cooperative people we came across during our stay there. 
The lovely beaches🌊,  the humongous sea, unlimited fun, flea market,  beach shacks, booze 🍺🍸🍹, nightclubs🎶💃, casino🎰, sea food🍗🍤, cashewnuts,  roaming around in the night🚴🚵…  Summarizes it all..  I simply loved the beach shacks…  It is like you are surrounded by a lot of people and at the same time you get your own privacy as well… We spent quality time together during this trip..  It was all what I had wanted my birthday to be🎂..!! Lucky to have a husband like J… No words can tell how grateful I  to be married to such a man.. Loads of love J 😍😘.. God bless you.. 😀

Being thankful….!!

– To the dearest darling husband… For being so patient with me..  And being there for me whenever I need… To be so tolerant whenever I throw a temper tantrum…  To make me feel so loved… I love you honey…  😘💜

– To the builder..  For finally letting us move into our own place 😜

– To the in laws..  fire adapting to changes and helping in doibg the shift so easy. 🙂

– To the proud mom n dad… Thanks a ton for staying with me for so long. For helping me setting up my new place as I wanted…  :):):)

– To the bestest sister for being so understanding…  Not to get upset when I kept shouting at you, when you were not at fault.. I love you girl…👭

– To JB, darling.. What have I done to get Av friend like you… You are a big blessing to me.  No matter whatever is going on at your end, you are always there to listen to my complaints…  Thanks a ton sweetheart…  :mrgreen:

Blogging….

So the darling BFF  JB started writing a blog..!! And she doesn’t know i have one..!!

I hate to keep secrets from her.. But as this was kind of my personal diary, i had not wanted anyone to scoop around and read what i am writing.. good or bad..!! I do not want to be judged on what i am writing..

Hence no one knows that  i blog.!! Although very very rarely.. but i do..!!!

So, JB pings me on whatsapp the other day and says, “Hey KR, my first blog ever..!! HTTP://**********.WordPress.com”.

She’s writing since a long time.. just not on a blog.. Writing is what she loves… It’s her getaway from all the troubles that she has.. and i had always wanted her to continue writing.. I want to see her write a book someday..!! She’s really very good at expressing things.!! So, i was really glad that she’s started with blogging..!!

And now she keeps me updated with when she’s putting up a blog post..! 🙂 Little does she know that i visit her blog everyday to check whether a new post is there and end up reading the previous ones all over again..!! :p

JB’s always been a blessing for me..!! No matter what the tym is.. how much the distance is.. and however busy she is.. she’ll always find time for me whenever i need..!!

Love you JB.. God Bless You..!! All the best for your Blog…!!!

 

On the 100 Happy days Challenge….!!!!

everyone seems to be doing the 100 happy days challenge these days.. Even the BFF J had started the 100 Happy days challenge.

I was happy to see her posts for this challenge.. I too had this urge of taking up the 100 Happy Days Challenge; which had to mean that i have to write up one post everyday on this blog, and Considering the type of workload and the depressing environment around me, i know writing up a post everyday is not possible for me.

Another question that arises in front of me is that what do i write each day for being happy.!!! I mean i aam not that happy everyday to write up a post on it..!! And like the BFF does, i do not even have one happy point that i can jot down everyday.!!!!

So here i am … trying to think of one happy thing or moment that i had today..!! And i am BLANK..!!! Literally BLANK..!!! I do not have anything more to say…!!! 🙂 🙂

Regrets..!!!

It’s such a relaxing day, not much work to do.. listening to songs on TV, and suddenly a wave of sadness arises in your heart.

I feel sad.. i regret leaving all my hobbies behind.. not being able to be in touch with friends frequemtly.. not being able to meet the people you love frequently.. it’s like your whole life is just changed. And you feel like no one can do anything for you. NOT ONE PERSON.

When i see girls dancing on TV, or when i see my cousin going to her Kathak classes every weekend, i feel sad.. i am disappointed with myself.. i regret leaving my dance classes.. Same is the case with my music class.. i love singing.. Now, i know that i do not have a good voice, and i am not that good singer also.. but i really like singing.. it is the only stress buster i’ve got.. And sadly i have stopped that also..

i have reduced my reading … i haven’t read any books lately.. nor have i bought one since a past few days..

It’s like someone has cut off my wings.. like no freedom… I cannot do things that i feel i want to do.. and it happens again..

A sudden surge of sadness takes over my heart.. and i am back to being upset..!!!!

 

Such is the life…!!!

Among all the things that can happen to you, my worst fear is to get disappointed. I hate being disappointed.. hence i keep very less expectations from people. I know expectations always hurt.. but no matter how much you try and prevent yourself from expecting from people, at some point of time u start expecting.. unintentionally… and when you are disappointed again and again… you feel miserable,.. angry.. cranky.. YES.. THAT IS WHAT I AM FEELING WRITE NOW.. i feel that there’s nothing that i can do to hide my disappointment…

And my being disturbed starts due to myself..!! i have to make myself understand that not everyone thinks like me.. nor will anyone ever get to think like me.. WHY WHY OH WHY DON’T I UNDERSTAND???? and i always comes back to priorities..!!! how do i make poeple understand about what shoukd matter them.. in what order should matter them..!!! WHHAAAAA..!!!!

Apart from all these stupid thoughts that i have in my mind all the time, i was really happy to see the kindness some people still have in them..!!

Here are a few things that made me smile today:

  • Wake up in the morning to see J looking at me smiling… 🙂
  • remembering school days on seeing kids boarding their school buses for picnic.. 🙂
  • A beggar controlling the traffic..!! (i was astound.. not because of what he did.. but becoz people were actually following his instructions..! 🙂 )
  • missing my friends when i see a group sitting on katta having tea..!! tapri wali chai… mmmmmmm
  • on seeing a very old friend in the shopping mall…
  • on heaving a sigh of relief when getting to know that the dearest bestest friend of mine is gonna join me back home..!!!

yaaaay folks.. i m goin home..!! to my dear mother’s place..!! after a long tym..!! mom.. i can’t wait to see you..!!

Gud nyt people..!! that’s all i hv gotta say today..!!

 

PRIORITIES….!!!!

Why is it so difficult to accept?? Not all the people you know have their priorities set in life..!! Not all people know how and when the priorities change?? And it is a fact, that when you have your priorities set, you are bound to hurt people and they hurt you in turn.. May it be unintentionally.. How do you feel when you have done everythung for the people you love the most.. And in turn he does not appreciate the effort u’hv put into?? Did you ever face such a circumstance, where for an important event in your life, you’ve compromised your friends, relaltions, hobbies, even your career.. And no one appreciates..!! Not even the person who knows how much his appreciation would mean to you..!! How do u deal with the frustration..!! Sleep deprived nights, non stop thinking, rising anger for that person, the fear of being disappointed again..!! Do u ever feel that?? How could i try to do something new n different irrespective of knowing i will be disappointed once again…??? Do i even stop trying??

Is life always like this?? Do u get everything u want in life ever?? I am a dreamer.. I love dreaming.. I wish my life could be the one in my dream.. But, i know.. It cannot be the same.. Rather i dnt expect it to be the same.. I just want small happy moments that i could cherish in my life forever..  I am an adjustice type of person.. But that doesnt mean i adjust my whole life..?? Right..!! I m sick of being on the second choice.. This is endless..!! I can go uotp limits to talk on this..!! Whhhhhhaaaaaa…!!! 😦 😦 😦